South Africa’s natural beauty is almost unsurpassed – we have some of the most beautiful views, food and people on the planet. A glance out your window or at your fellow passengers will confirm that. Well, definitely out the window… The maxim ‘you get what you pay for’ rings especially true when it comes to the finer things in life – so pay up, and live it up.

Pezula Private Castle – R91 508 per night

If your lifelong dream has been to reprise the role of the ‘French Taunter’ from Monty Python & The Holy Grail, you can hire your own private castle on one of the country’s most beautiful and secluded beaches. Pezula Private Castle overlooks the beach at Noetzie, just outside Knysna. If you’re going to go for it, go all-in, so don’t worry about the two smaller castles nearby – the 656m² Pezula Castle has three en-suite bedrooms – two of which have terraces – a gym; a ‘Great Room’ with a fireplace; a chef’s kitchen; 10-seater dining room; a heated swimming pool and a wine cellar.

Named by CNBC as “Best Property in the World”, Pezula Castle offers direct beach access and a dedicated team of staff including an executive butler and private chef. The bar is stocked in advance with your favourite drinks and South Africa’s finest wines and even the reading material and DVD library can be tailored to your personal tastes. Once you’ve successfully blown raspberries from the ramparts, a private transfer can be arranged to take you to the Conrad Pezula Resort & Spa where you can drink and dine at three restaurants, play 18 holes at the Championship Course, or hone your peasant-targeting skills on the archery range. Conrad Pezula

Rovos Rail – Durban Safari R30 500 per person sharing

If the thought of slaloming trucks and constant panic about the presence of speed cameras on the N3 is just too much to bear, unfurrow your brow and still your racing heart – Rovos Rail offers a three-day Durban Safari from Pretoria (or in reverse) at a level of luxury fully-deserving of the moniker ‘Royal Suite’.

Some of the country’s most beautiful tropical scenery slides by your panoramic window at a leisurely 60km/h as you sip a glass of the country’s finest wine from your personalized minibar, in your wood-paneled Royal Suite. En route to or from Durban, you’ll stop for a game drive at Nambiti Private Game Reserve, a battlefield tour at Spionkop and a visit to the famous Ardmore Ceramics Gallery. At the end of the day, a decadent bath in your en-suite bathroom should be enough to revive you ahead of dinner in the jacket & tie Victorian dining car, to which you will be summoned by a gong.

If you’d like to take a longer journey, why not try the Cape Town – Dar es Salaam (or reverse) trip, run three times a year. The two week-excursion will set you back around R225 000 per person sharing, in a Royal Suite. Rovos Rail

Royal Malewane – R84 000 per night

You can pack the cooler bag, wrap the sandwiches in tinfoil and self-drive yourself through a game reserve in the hope of spotting something other than an Impala. Or you can visit Royal Malewane, a private reserve in the Greater Kruger and have every bushveld whim catered to, with extraordinary guided game viewing, unsurpassed fine dining and an award-winning spa.

The Royal and Malewane suites sleep 4 each, in palatial comfort. Your own dedicated tracker and ranger will help you explore the bush in a private vehicle, before returning you to your suite to take your drinks on the massive outside deck, by the private pool or amongst the curated antiques and curios in the stylish private dining room. Those guests unable to relax despite the proximity of Africa’s beautiful scenery, receive a complementary massage, per day.

If ‘family’ game viewing is your thing, try the Africa House, which sleeps up to 12 guests in a self-contained bush paradise, for R167 800 per night. Want to book out the entire Royal Malewane Lodge for a private bush getaway? You and 31 of your closest friends can live like kings for R470 000 per night. Royal Malewane

Chartered Jet Transfer – R250 000

If you’re going to spend R84 000 per night on your lavish stay at Royal Malewane, you probably won’t want to spoil the experience by having to drive there and back. Comair Flight Services can ferry your party of 8 from Jo’burg or Cape Town to either the Jackalberry airstrip at the lodge, or nearby Hoedspruit Airport, in your own private chartered aircraft.

You’ll depart from private lounges at OR Tambo, Cape Town and Lanseria, helping you avoid queues and set your own departure time. CFS’ Pilatus PC-12 turbo-prop can deliver you to Jackalberry in executive style from OR Tambo for around R60 000 for a two-night stay. The larger jet-engined Cessna Citation Sovereign is the epitome of luxury, flown by two crew members and boasting a flight attendant to cater to passengers’ in-flight needs, including VIP catering and a fully-stocked bar. Jetting in – literally – for 2 nights at Royal Malewane via Hoedspruit Airport in the Citation Sovereign will cost in the region of R200 000 for departures from OR Tambo, and R250 000 from Cape Town International. Royal Malewane will lay on additional rooms for your crew – including meals, local beverages, game drives and laundry, for R5 300 per person, per night. Comair Flight Services

The One&Only Cape Town Presidential Suite – R91 365 per night

There is no better view in the fairest Cape than from the balcony of the two-bedroom Presidential Suite at One&Only Cape Town. You’ll feel as though you can reach out and touch the top of Table Mountain and that Cape Town has been laid out before you for your exclusive use. If the view starts to lose its sparkle, guests need only turn around to admire the interior artwork, featuring custom glass roundels by Conrad Botes, a detailed wirework by Walter Oltmann or the coastal photograph in the study, by national treasure David Goldblatt.

The 382m² space is characterised by swooping double-volume areas, a fully-equipped kitchen and luxurious bathrooms. A private dining area seats up to 12 guests, with service marshalled by a dedicated butler. Each bedroom has a king-size bed, his-and-hers bathrooms with rain showers (one of which can be converted to a steam room) and walk-in closets. The personal gym – served by a separate entrance – also has a massage bed while the ‘second lounge’ has a work desk with computer and printer so your business empire needn’t miss a beat while you drink in the view. At night, customise your bath and turndown service with options from the One&Only Cape Town bath and room scent menus. One&Only Cape Town

Supercar Rental – R40 000 per day

Since you’re staying at Cape Town’s most prestigious address, you may as well get around in style as well. Status Luxury Vehicles will let you unleash your inner Jeremy Clarkson in a 460kW, 333 km/h 2012 McLaren MP4-12C for around R40 000 per day. Plus a deposit. And some insurance. And once you exhaust your limit of 100 free kilometres per day, each additional 1000m of your journey will set you back another R300.00.

If that seems a little opulent, show your grasp of subtlety by downgrading to a Ferrari 458 Italia, for just R30 000 per day. Parking not included. Status Luxury Vehicles

The Tasting Room at Le Quartier Francais – from R1 300 per person

So you’re tooling around the Cape in your supercar, and you’re feeling a little peckish. Concerned that your McLaren may not make it over the speedbumps at the entrance to the fast food drive-thru? Why not pop through to Franschhoek and visit The Tasting Room at Le Quartier Francais, home to the limitless imagination and exquisite skills of Chef Margot Janse?

The most-lauded fine dining restaurant in the country – and recognised internationally by a slew of awards – The Tasting Room experience is a one-off. The 8-course African-inspired menu changes at the whim of Chef Janse depending on availability of ingredients and what technique she and her awe-inspiring team feel like showing off that day. Expect dishes like Octopus with daikon, cucumber, horseradish and sorrel nori, Joostenberg vlakte duck with boerenkinders puree and grapes or a Snow Globe with ‘num num’ and rice crispies. Each course is paired – of course – with similarly-decorated South African wines. Leave yourself at least 3.5 hours to linger over the fusion of taste and nostalgia and ‘dress for the experience you want to have’. And yes, you’ll need to book. Le Quartier Francais

Luxury Motor Yacht Charter – R55 200 for 8 hours

If the pressure of hunting for parking in Cape Town at the height of tourist season gets too much, take to the water in your own chartered yacht. The 85 foot Princess Emma can accommodate 12 guests and cruise the waters from Clifton Beach to False Bay, and onwards to the Langebaan Lagoon.

Moored at the playground that is the V&A Marina, the Princess Emma is available for charter for a few hours – or a few days. Party on the wide aft deck or cuddle up in one of four luxurious en-suite cabins. Lounge in the sun on the foredeck or brave the frosty Cape waters from the rear swimming platform. The full crew and stewardess will cater for your every whim, serving canapés, local wine beers and soft drinks as you try to count the number of envious glances you’re drawing from the sorry land-lubbers on the beach. Longer multi-day charters are available on request. And don’t forget to bring your petrol card – travel beyond 15 nautical miles draws an additional fuel charge. Princess Emma

*This article originally appeared in khuluma.